Two coats of Diamond Cosmetics Drift Away
This is Diamond Cosmetics Drift Away. Normally I really love their stuff because it's a nice formula with a good color range for only $2.25 a bottle(!!!!!!). But this one? Not so much. Sure, it's sophisticated, but it also makes me feel old. Like, "I'm just havin' drinks with my girlfriends after work, I'm single, in my 30's, and FABULOUS! Break me off a piece of that hunk o' man!" Like ladies night gone wrong at a male strip club. Cringe.
Clearly, there's nothing wrong with being 37 or single or a working woman, but the whole image was just a bit much for me. Too much of a Lifetime Sex and the City knockoff that just ends up being really, really bleak. Let me just piss on your grave, Betty Friedan, this is what you fought for and it is BLEAK.
So obviously I did the most logical (and feminist) thing and added some holographic glitter. Nothing says young, self-actualized, assertive (but not bitchy) 21st-century woman like glitter. (I'm sure somewhere in college towns across America women's studies majors are crying out in horror, while the comparative sociology majors would argue that as a self-actualized woman I should have the right to wear whatever I choose, because it's my choice, damnit. But I digress.)
One coat of OPI Designer Series Original over Drift Away
I've never used the OPI Designer Series before, it's $12 as opposed to $8 and claims to have real diamond dust in it, to which I say pish-posh. Frankly I had high hopes for this, and while it is nice and sparkly, it's just not quite right. Maybe I wasn't in the mood for it, perhaps I did need something taupier, more neutral and sophisticated. Instead I got "OH HI I'M 12 AND ALL OF THSE NAIL POLISH FUMES HAVE GOTTEN TO ME." Which isn't exactly far from the truth, either.